Do you think that i should have the parenting time suspended forever? Do you think that he diserves to be a parent(i don't)?
Need opinions here?Need advice about Dad? ASAP!!! Need as many answer's as possibe!?
How about you refuse to go see him anymore? If you can explain to your mother why you don't want to see him any longer on his weekend visits, go for it. Explain to her what you have posted here. Once you get older you can try and build a relationship with him again, with YOU setting the ground rules.
Sounds like dad is trying to put you in the middle of the divorce. Too bad he can't be an adult. Probably explains why your folks are split.
Good Luck!Need advice about Dad? ASAP!!! Need as many answer's as possibe!?
since your dad is toxic it's time for you to cut him from your life. just because he is your parent or because he is family doesn't mean that he can treat you like crap and it doesn't mean that he has to be friends. it seems to me like your dad is way insecure and because of that he is acting outwardly by trying to make himself seem bigger than everyone else is.
http://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Parents-Susa鈥?/a>
try getting the above book. althogh your dad may not be toxic by the books definition...he is in some way. this book may help you to deal with his toxicity effectively.
How old are you? If you're still a minor (under 18), and your dad has even partial custody, you're going to have to get your mother to prove that he's an unfit parent. So talk to your mom about this, and see what she says. You might need some counseling as well, especially if you have a hard time trusting men. Your dad isn't all men, he's 1 man. You just sound like a teenager here to me. And the way you feel is completely normal, because all teens think that their parents don't understand them.
And no, I don't think he needs his parental rights severed, unless he's being abusive.
why don't you try to talk to your mom about what your dad is saying to you see if she can advise you
He's probably pissed because he has to pay lots in child support. It's NOT your fault that the marriage didn't last. That's the main point here. He is takings things out on you and no one deserves that kind of treatment. I would look into the Department of Children and Family Services. Let them know what is going on. Maybe they can help you with your problem. They take things seriously if no one else is listening to you. Let them know exactly what he is saying and doing. They might help you find a counselor. Don't lose faith in all guys. He is messing with your mind. Just try to ignore it and try to not spend time with him. What does your mom have to say about it?
You need to stay away from your dad if it is at all possible.
stay away from him!! he has no right saying those things to you and he doesn't deserve to be a dad. please don't see him anymore until he decides to clean up his act!!
I have a father just like that...
Just know that some fathers just don't know how to be a father their darn selves! They are frightened that you may end up like them so they just make up things and excuses why they did or didn't do curtain things to make life better. I accept that b/c I now understand. Right now, I just call my dad to say hi and try to see him but he always makes up excuses. I just give him phone calls every now and then just to say hi, just to let him know that I still think of him but I keep our conversations at a limit b/c I don't want to be hurt from broken promises and etc. My advice to you is to do the same. Just focus on yourself and hopefully in the future, you will carefully pick someone who will not be like that to your children. Then again men do change so, I think he'll come around. Mine came for 15 mins to my apt for Thanksgiving. I thought it was going to snow. Plus, he called me for my birthday- I was floored! He didn't do that for my other sibilings. Just don't ask him why he does or don't do whatever. My brother died last year in a car accident and he showed no sadness, but I knew he was dying inside b/c my brother just left from talking to him the day he died. My brother went to him and wrote his number down and put it in my dad's shirt pocket and said call me(b/c he don't). I know he regrets that! I just let him be and he seems to come around (not often) but at least once in a blue moon. We are all humans and relate to things in life differently. Just don't give up!
dad cares about one thing and that is dad,he is looking out for number one,stay clear of him until he realizes he is making a big mistake
What your dad is doing borders on emotional abuse. Tell your mom and the social worker who handles your case that you don't want to see your dad anymore, or if you must, that your time together be supervised. If you deliver your messge firmly and calmly, they will be more likely to listen to you.
Ask your mom to enroll you with a therapist so that you can talk through and overcome your distrust of men.
you sound like you need space. maybe a couple months... maybe years... maybe a life time. if or when you allow him in your life, it should only be under the conition that he is respectful. that is emtional abuse hon... not all guys are like that
I wish my girls could see there fathers faults. He uses them just like he used me. He has lived with two of the daughters for free. He can't watch the grandkids because of his health(which he plays to his own advantage.) He is able to ride his motorcycle all of the country in all kinds of weather. He drinks, smokes and does all kind of work for his girlfriend, mows her lawn, paints, builds her a shed , etc. this list is too long. He is too tight to send flowers to his only uncle funeral , but buys his girlfriend diamonds. Tells, his grandchildren he can't afford much so he gives them savings bonds. that cost him $12.50 each. He lies so much he does not even know what the truth is. He makes sure he goes back to his own place each night so he can tell the girls he and his girlfriend are just friends. He is such a work or art. He has messed up the girls for all his lies. His one daughter is now following in his footsteps, she has been cheating on her husband and calling it friendship. They have learned to lie from the expert. If you come back to your apartment each night they do not call it and affair. Yet, she is not sure if the last grandson is her husbands. Thank goodness you see the light. tell me how my girls will finally see the light of day. He is such a charmer and has lied so much even he doesn't know the truth. But it does not make a good parent and screws everyones life up. I think you dad needs to be shown the door to your life until he can get his head on straight. Good for you for seeing thur the man. I know you love him and he is your dad, but you deserve only the best life can offer and he sure is not it.
Your Dad sounds like a jerk. You don't mention your age, but keep in mind before you know it, you'll be an adult. Time flies - trust me. Speak with a school councillor or a teacher - they are adults that WON'T think your Dad looks like a good guy. There are ALOT of people out there that shouldn't be parents - just promise to be a good one when your time comes. I know that it seems like the end of the world when you have problems at home - it really isn't. My father was strict and I contemplated suicide when I was a teen. Thank God - I didn't do it. Now, I'm 40, have 2 great teens of my own, and my Dad has passed away. I laugh now at how much drama I felt when I was a teen. It WILL pass. Good Luck!
Well how old r you??
My ex husband does the same thing to my boys. He is verbally abusing you and if he truly loved you he would not lie to you and talk to you that way. I think that you should do what makes YOU happy, am not sure how old you are but you do not deserve to spend time with someone who treats you that way-relative or no relative-can you talk to your mom about this or maybe a counselor or close relative? It sounds like your dad is taking his anger and frustrations out on you simply because you're convenient. You don't deserve that or need that in your life.
Tell him to shove it!! And then remind him that when he's older and in a old folk's home and wants to see you, he'll only have himself to blame that you won't visit.
tell him that u love him cause he is ur father but u can longer be around him because he is to hurtfull and u need only things in ur life to enrich ur life and if he can chang his ways then u will let him back in
how old are you? where is your mom? see if you can move to your moms. or stay out of his way until you can move out and promise yourself to never treat your children this way. my dad was the same way, now he wants a relationship and its hard for me to do that. my children are my life, i live to guide and help them in there life. good luck.
I don't think that you 'can' have his 'parenting time suspended forever' ... that is something that only a 'court of law' may do, and you may be too 'young' to have your 'opinions' respected in a court of law. You should talk to your mother first, and ask for her 'help' ... because it may be that only she can actually 'sue' for 'no visitation' ... but you should also be aware that getting the court involved means that if you 'change your mind' and want to see your father again for any reason, you may not 'be allowed to' by the court. You write 'well' even though you have 'misspelled' some words, so I'm guessing that you are a 'teenager' so your 'best bet' might be simply to 'visit your dad' when his 'visit time' is scheduled, and just 'live with his lies and hatred'... which can be 'extremely easy' for you if you can just remember that what your dad 'thinks and/or says' don't have to 'influence you' in ANY WAY. All you 'must do' is 'put up with him' because that is what the court has 'ordered.' I know that it is 'hard' for you and that you think that 'nobody ever listens or understands how hard it is' ... but I think that you are 'putting onto someone else' the responsibility for a 'fix' for you that may not even be possible. No one should 'deserve' to be a parent, because EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES and unfortunately many of those mistakes 'hurt' our children. As 'a child' your job is simply to 'try to grow up to be the BEST I can be' and if that means that you must 'endure' your dad and try to 'ignore his ravings' then maybe 'just doing it' will actually HELP YOU TO UNDERSTAND what it means to be 'the BEST you can be.' So ... go 'talk with' your mom, but if you don't get the answer you 'want' I have at least given you the best 'advice' on how to 'deal with your dad' when you must visit him. Remember, all you are doing is 'visiting' and you don't have to 'listen to and take in' anything he says ... and that also should mean that you may be 'wary' of men after this, but that you should also be able to 'give them room' to be who THEY ARE and not 'see all men as your father is' because you should know that all men are not 'bad' ... you simply must 'look for a good man' to be your husband, lover, and you have a WONDERFUL EXAMPLE of the 'BAD' to help you make the 'right choice' for yourself.
Speaking as someone who lost there dad to cancer at a very young age I'd say.... No you shouldn't stop seeing your dad. I promise you later in life you will regret it. Why not go to counsiling to find out how to better deal with him? Or better yet see if he'll go to counsiling WITH you? That way you can both talk about issues and perhaps get some help on how to relate to one another better. I know parents are a hard thing to deal with... but just giving up on your dad isn't the right thing to do. Give it a try if it fails then cut your losses but if it works you'lll have a dad and friend for the rest of your life. And that is SO important.
I think go with ur mother
Talk to mom or another family member give yourself distance from dad my dad was the same way but as far as your too much money that's tough for him he has to support you until your 18 and if not did you know you can sue him for back child support -if he does not -YOU can .Find a job un the mean time and do good in school. I know it's hard but you can do it good luck! :)
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